is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
It's just like the Real World with babies
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
As shirtless as possible
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
