i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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