I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
