just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
