are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
