Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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