i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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