So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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