Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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