im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize