I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
