I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
