I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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