I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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