Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
he was CRYING into my vagina
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
40s are totally the cure
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
i now understand why vodka
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize