took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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