Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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