The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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