I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
the raccoons are back...
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