"it" just moved
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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