is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Randomize
