I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize