did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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