i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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