Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize