so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize