We won't sleep together?
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
