the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
