im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
