Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
