Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
