Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
