Do vagina's smell?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
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