bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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