I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize