just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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