I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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