Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
