Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
