You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
