foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
