No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
