my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
