Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
