The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
