hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize