she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
