Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
