To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
