You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
