In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
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